“I Don’t Know” Is a Full Answer
Knowing that "I Don't Know" was surprisingly freeing for me.
Hi from Big Sky!
We decided to drive the hour up for a Sunday Funday with the two kiddos who are home. I was second-guessing my decision when we were having some trouble in the car, but we settled down after a few minutes.
We booked tickets to go up to the peak riding the scenic tram, and as we walked up to show our tickets, they closed it due to lightning and an incoming storm. Classic. I think this tram is closed more than it’s open, honestly. There are some other activities for kids up there, but all of them were closed until the weather cleared up. So, we found a coffee shop to get some decaf iced coffee (big treat) and call it a day.
We are driving home now with Kivi and Tuki playing in the background, and I’m taking the opportunity to write to you.
Earlier this week, my very special friend Jen, who lives in Alaska, was visiting Bozeman, and we got to hang out for a few hours. It wasn’t enough, but we packed in a good visit with the time we had available to us. Jen’s energy is magical! Most befitting, since she is an energy healer. Anyway, we get deep fast, and we talked about everything!
Of course, one of the hot topics we talked about is how little control we have over our lives and how hard and annoying that can be. Which brought me to a discussion I had recently with my 🥁🥁🥁 therapist.
I often want to have the answers to all the questions and solutions to all the problems (I’m pretty sure most of us do!). Like, fine, give me the challenge, but also maybe give me a hint on how I should handle it, what choice is the right choice…. So many times, I feel lost and confused. So many times, I get asked, what are you going to do about this, or what are you going to do about that? It would be so nice to have the answers, to be able to have a plan all laid out.
That is when my therapist said to me, “I don’t know” is a full answer. Yeah, I know it doesn’t sound earth-shattering, but let it sit with you for a minute. Intellectually, we know this, but we don’t actually let ourselves embrace it in our bodies. I can’t really explain it, but when I leaned into that, I felt a weight being lifted off my shoulders. It’s not even about having answers for everyone else; it’s about me. I give myself full permission to face a problem or a challenge and to tell myself that I don’t know how this is going to go. I don’t even know what choices I’m going to make. I don’t know how I’m going to handle it. I just don’t know. One foot in front of the other. You’ll figure it out one tiny step at a time.
For example: What am I going to do now that Menny is home from camp? I don’t know 🤷♀️
This one little narrative shift was so impactful for me, I wanted to share it with you!
We don’t, and can’t, have all the answers! Take a deep breath, tell yourself it’s ok not to know! You’ll know when you’re supposed to know.
💕 Chavie
This Week on Totally Unexpected!
I still cannot get over Sorella’s story. Also, the prompt for this episode was: Tell me about the time you forgave someone or asked someone for forgiveness! Highly recommend listening to the fascinating stories that came in from listeners about their personal journey’s with forgiveness.
Love this! Really resonates with me!
Once again , you nailed it !!!
(Sorella as well )